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Mom bod

I’ve been doing CrossFit now for three months, and I’m definitely stronger. But I haven’t been following a paleo diet, so I’m still carrying the baby weight around the middle, although I’m reasonably strong for a scrawny chick.

However, out of pure vanity, I’m dissatisfied with the way my body looks.

1) My boobs. Where did those postpartum porn-worthy knockers go? Oh yeah, now I remember – they’ve had the life sucked out of them from breastfeeding. I used to say I would never, ever, EVER get implants, but this is just one example of how being a mom has made me less judgmental and more open-minded.

2) My waist. I’m not following a paleo diet, which is what is promoted by CrossFit. My diet consists of foods Tiny Boss finds acceptable – presently a lot of carbs, dairy, and fruit. What he doesn’t finish, I eat. I cook for him and don’t have time to prep separately for myself. Ain’t nobody got time for that!

As a result, I fear I am starting to resemble a construction worker. Not this type:

Gratuitous hot guy photo. You're welcome.

Gratuitous hot guy photo. You’re welcome.

But the kind in their 40s, gut hanging out but brawny shouldered.

This could be me in a few years, minus the brewski and the beard.

This could be me in a few years, minus the brewski and the beard.

Good thing there’s the Internet to help put things in perspective.

body not ruined

Oh, and Tiny Boss. Nothing I wouldn’t give up for him.


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I used to think being an attorney was a tough job. Then I had kids.

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