RSS Feed

Silly Lady, Don’t You Know You Can Only Drug Your Own Kids?

Photo by Posterize at

Photo by posterize at

A couple weeks ago, a daycare worker in Morgan Hill, CA, was arrested for allegedly trying to drug the kids in her charge with Sominex, an over-the-counter sleeping pill.

According to the San Jose Mercury News, the 59-year-old woman “admitted that she placed an over-the-counter sleep medication into the cups.”

But wait! The exact same thing apparently also happened in Texas less than two years ago.


The daycare worker in that instance was arrested for allegedly actually giving the kids – ages 20 months to four years – milk laced with over-the-counter antihistamines. The woman in the California case was apparently in charge of the toddlers between the ages one to two.

As the mother of a thriving, active, food-throwing, headache-inducing, dog whistle-mimicking, sleep-depriving 13.5 month old little boy, I can see where the woman is coming from. Sort of.

I mean, there are days where I find myself chugging coffee at 6pm because I just can’t keep up with Tiny Boss otherwise.  Days where I start fantasizing paying for a babysitter just so I can close my eyes for half an hour. Where my lower back begins to ache from overwork despite my best attempts to use my glutes and hammies to deadlift the 22-pound Tiny Boss up into my arms when he so demands, and the demands can be often.

A little Ambien in the applesauce, and none the wiser.

A little Ambien in the applesauce, and none the wiser.

But I would never, ever, ever drug him (or any other kid) with sleeping pills. The idea is just beyond me. But then again, I don’t even give Tiny Boss anything with artificial colors, unlike my in-laws, who have a tendency to feed him Fruit Loops.

Or so I say now. I guess one thing I have learned from parenthood is that “never” doesn’t mean crap. Ask me two years ago if I would be a stay at home mom and I would have said laughed and said no. Ask me that same question 10 years ago and I would have probably kneed you in the crotch.

And here I am today. Granted, a WAHM, but I wouldn’t want to work at an office and have to place Tiny Boss in daycare. So who knows, maybe in thirty years I’ll be dissolving Benadryl into my toddler grandkids’ Kool-aid and Tang.



I used to think being an attorney was a tough job. Then I had kids.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: