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How to Get Your Husband Back for Peeing on the Toilet Seat

Ok, I know it’s a stereotype that women hate it when men leave the toilet seat up. But I don’t have that problem. My problem is that my husband doesn’t always put the toilet seat up before peeing. Meaning I will at times, like I did today, sit down on the toilet at 6am on a gross, wet, peed-on seat.

A little bit about my husband: he grew up with three brothers. So I imagine that all three other brothers pee with the toilet seat up, and therefore, my own husband never experienced 6am-wetass.

Empathy: “a deep emotional understanding of another’s feelings or problems.” Um yeah, clearly that is what was needed. So to aid my husband in gaining a little empathy for this pee-on-the-seat problem (and to stop myself from throttling him), this is what I did:

Step 1: Get a Spray Bottle and Fill it With Water

This is where it all begins.

This is where the fun  begins.

Step 2: Lightly Spray Toilet Seat

Pro tip: try to use a fine mist and not leave large water drops on the seat which could be visually detected and give you away.

Pro tip: try to use a fine mist and not leave large water drops on the seat which could be visually detected and give you away.

Step 3: Remove Light Bulb(s) In Bathroom

IMG_9041

If he asks, tell him the light bulb burned out. If you have more than one light, make something else up, like the circuit breakers need to be reset. The point is to minimize his chances of seeing the wet seat before he sits down.

Now, for this to work, it does take some planning because you want to do all this for when he uses the bathroom to take a dump and not to pee. Fortunately, my husband is a creature of habit, so this part was easy.

Here’s the result. Don’t worry, I didn’t film him pooping, because that would be REALLY gross.

Bonus: Blogging about it and posting it on Facebook.

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About MOM THIS MOM THAT

I used to think being an attorney was a tough job. Then I had kids.

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